Can we allow what seems to be in the way, without label, blame, or trying to fix it?

Creativity can emerge from many states, moods and vibes. Desperation. Anger. Joy. But when existence itself feels like a real burden, that’s another story. If you find yourself in such a place, I’d like to offer a glimpse into an altogether different way to regard it. A way that may feel nebulous and counter-intuitive. That takes discipline, and is absolutely unconventional. But 100% pure.

One could call it the “art” of finding “peace with the non peace.” It’s practiced by neither pretending you’re OK, nor wallowing in the story of why you think you’re not. It’s built on a literal flip of cause and effect. It takes “faith” in what we cannot see, and willingness to trust. Most of the time you’ll feel like you’re getting nowhere. Screwing it up. Doing it wrong. Missing something. It takes a lot of practice, reminding, and discipline. But it builds, and can reveal.

“Peace with the non peace” is where we watch the personal mind from a place of total non-judgment. Though it may sound simple, you won’t find it easy. But in times when you’re stuck, when you can find no “fix,” when you’re not getting what “you” think you want and all the vegan ice cream in the world can’t help, you can find a bench in the shade, and do your best to allow the feeling. Just the feeling. Without blaming what you think caused it, without story or labels that say it’s bad or wrong. Try it and you’ll see. Thoughts will try to find a way out. A “cause.” Notice and let them pass. Then just stay there. As long as it takes.

Creatives often find themselves “dealing” with what we typically call these tough “inner states.” If you truly feel hopeless, you’ll probably seek a conventional “fix,” and I am absolutely saying you should. Great. You might read books, listen to 215 podcasts, find a therapist, start meds, sit in lotus, change your gender, eat healthier, go on a retreat, find your purpose, do a cleanse, run a marathon or build a boat out of toothpicks and Instagram your voyage to Tahiti after quitting your job at WPP. If you’re suffering, you’ll find the methods. the feeling is all the encouragement you’ll need. If you need a Band-Aid, please get a Band-Aid. If you do, my only “advice” would be stick with one sort, and don’t mix ‘em.

But if and when all of that kind of thing runs its course, if and when you realize that seeking a fix for what cannot be fixed (the “me”) doesn’t work, that seeking happiness out there just moves the goal post, well, there is another way.

Even though it’s not a “doing” as much as a “non-doing,” and even though it’s not my place to “teach it,” I have a lot of empathy for how it feels when we can’t seem to muster the gumption to do anything else. If you find yourself struggling to “be creative,” what I’m talking about here is about a deep way to stop fighting it, (as struggles survive on struggle). But listen, this is not apathy. Nor is it about the “weak” definition of surrender. It takes more courage and bravery than the world will ever know. I’m not an expert. But I do understand how life can feel. And how it feels to try and meet a work deadline when it feels like that.

Brick & Mortar Work Tip 09: You’re reaching for the Oatly® barista creamer and there they are. They look sad, mad or apatheticAF. You might be the one they need to hold the space. Doing your best to deeply listen, refraining from suggesting any fix. Being a presence that transcends their story, that neither affirms nor denies. Meet ‘em there. Just try not to be too creepy about it.

It may pass. It will probably come back. You will forget this. You will judge yourself that you should not feel this way. That it’s your fault. You’ll try to manage it with thoughts, blame yourself, him, her, them, that. You’ll say it’s horrible and has to stop. But then you’ll remember, and you will practice again. And reveal a bit of peace with the non-peace.